My Guinea Pig Rules The Roost

You’re here about my guinea pig?

What has he done this time?

There’s nothing that I’ve done so far,

That’s made him toe the line.

He seem to find some pleasure,

In pooping where he pleases,

Down your shirt and in your shoe,

And on your trouser knee-ies!

As for the weeing everywhere,

It doesn’t matter how I protest,

He likes to make the carpet smell,

And put our cleaner to the test.

Has he chewed your button off?

Or ripped a hole in your t shirt?

Or did he make it to the skin,

My word, that must have hurt!

The hay you found in your handbag,

Was probably down to him,

He tends to flick it everywhere,

When he runs about popcorning!

It doesn’t matter what I do,

Or even what I say,

It’s quite clear to see,

At least to me,

My guinea pig rules the roost! Okay!