Seriously Weird Searches Saturday . . .


What on Earth are there crazy hoomans saying this time?!

Well Mummy was having a little look at her stats to see what people are searching for that brings them here.

The great part is, the majority are searching the blog name and finding us. Other searches include “help, my guinea pig has heat stroke” “my guinea pig is sick, what should i do” “guinea pig first aid kit” “homemade guinea pig toys” “what to give bored guinea pigs” and “try to stay mad at these adorable faces”

All very cute and normal, but then there are some strange one’s that made Mummy pull faces and wonder how on Earth they ended up here!

A few of our favourites include:

if men had tails like dogs do name something that would cause them to wag  –  But hoomans don’t has tails . . . I suppose they would wag if they saw a cute piggy though.

i just smile becuase [sic] i have no idea what you are saying pics  –  Often whee don’t know what the hoomans are on about. They say you should humor the insane though!

mummy pumpkins – Daddy pumpkins, Auntie pumpkins, Uncle pumpkins and baby pumpkins?

i like pig butts and i can not lie  – Those skinny piggies can’t deny!

how to prevent a deck from being slick when wet – What . . . ? Just what?! Put some hay on it whee guess.

disney crows shoe fly – Erm. Well whee like the Disney bit but you lost us after that!

why piggy not happy – Because hooman no make good grammar right.

guenea[sic] pig addiction to basil  – That’s easy to understand, I’m addicted to me too ~Basil

please may i  – May you what? Dance a jig for our entertainment? Certainly.

little rodent like creature with face like pig  – Nope, whee got no idea what that could be . . .

doing nothing mission accomplished  – *cough* Our every day plan *cough*

look into my eyes you will see tumblr  – *squints* Nope, whee just see eyes. No Tumblr in there

whoever says they slept lik [sic] a baby obvioysly[sic] dlesnt[sic] have one  – Well that’s not at all bitter! Lack of sleep impairs one’s ability to type (Mummy feels for you!)

babes bauddy[sic]  – Can’t decide if they are searching for Buddy’s Babes or something else entirely and really can’t spell!

amazing feet awards  – Whee do have nice feet! What do whee win?!

how to huch[sic] a teddy real good  – Is it just our immature Mummy sniggering or does this sound really wrong?!! ^_^

poop through feathers  – Whee don’t have feathers . . . let alone any poop through them!

more+rounded”.+skinny+girls+are+good+as+ramp+models+but  – You really didn’t plan to end up on a guinea pig blog did you my friend?!

why is it i have no idea on what’s going on around  – Whee ask ourselves the very same thing. One of life’s mysteries whee suppose!

a song that says it’s like bing bing bing bing it’s like woo woo woo woo  – Whee don’t know it but it makes us wanna dance!

“santa tells me if i’m nutty or nice  – I’m Nutty and nice . . . s’all good! ~Nutty

as charming as you are, you are unlikely ever to receive a better valentine  – Wow, harsh. How did that get you to us? Should whee be insulted?!


So there you go. A selection of crazy from the very weird searches that led hoomans here! Why not check your stats and let us know the weirdest searches that brought hoomans to your blog?! Give us a good giggle!

Smile this Saturday

Nutty, Nacho, Buddy & Basil


About hutchagoodlife

Tales and adventures from the hutches of British blogging guinea pigs!

Posted on August 24, 2013, in Piggy Blogs and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 59 Comments.

  1. BOL.I better not look at mine with my Bra and Alfie being Gay , wonder what will come up Bawahwhhahwhaaa Have a great bank holiday xxooxx

    Mollie and Alfie

  2. hehehe some strange people about,xx Speedy

  3. Oh, my. The searches were so funny, but your comments were even funnier. I was reading them on my phone while I was propped up in bed & laughed so hard the whole bed shook. Just what I needed. I’m gonna read these to my friends.

  4. These were great my friend. I’m definitely going to have to check mine. I can only imagine with my blog bring titled pig love – snorts. XOXO – Bacon

  5. xD that was so funny!
    Whee ve found a few:

    Pear faced animal
    xxxxxxxxxx animals
    Minipig Frankfurt 28 nov
    Famous piece of artwork
    To inspire let go of fears and insecurities
    Ripnugget nini
    Can I yoos clicker paint
    Vote poppy fo

    Who even searches for some of these??
    Piggy kisses,
    Poppy and Clover

  6. Ha ha ha – this way does madness…

  7. Those are some funny, crazy searches. Ya gotta wonder… Some people found us looking for school bulletin board designs. I’m not even allowed at school!!

    Love and licks,

  8. You’re right boys – somehow people find us when they’re searching for the weirdest things! Mom and I just took a peek at our stats and found these totally weird search terms: “Turkish kitten excited in the morning” (huh??), “Load of naughty” (well I sort of understand that one), “Inside cat ears close up” (really??), “Large curled leaf on lawn covers grass” (that’s a real puzzler!), and this one TOTALLY escapes me, “Pillows with seagulls”……..WHAT THE HECK?? Tee Hee Anyway, makes for a good giggle. Happy Saturday!

    Kitty Hugs, Sammy

  9. hehehe! What a good giggle! Love it! =^.^=

  10. Hahahaha xD that made me crack up, perfect way to start the day. I don’t have weird terms like this leading to my blog!! 😦 Wish I did. Love your responses to it!

  11. Lol that’s definitely weird.

  12. I think we are scared to see why people come to our blog…such odd stuff!

  13. Very funny blog post! It’s a strange world we live in!

    Xxx oooo
    squeakss and Steeviie

  14. Thanks for this post, that’s toooooo funny! I would like to see this jig :o) have a great saturday!

  15. Reblogged this on St. Val the Eccentric and commented:
    A hilarious take on one hilarious aspect of blogging — what the blank people search on to find your blog. My personal favorites in my own case: ”

    does ned flanders drink tea” and “pieta mary magdalene madelein l’engle” and “you’re not consciously that you are breathing meme” (I am consciously you no write English) and “i don’t xare what day he died on jesus” and “why god gives us eccentric mothers” and “sailing for god coloring page” and “patron saint catharine guinea pigs” (noting that “catharine” is spelled wrongly) and

  16. Oh, and there was a longer reply that got erased when my browser crashed.

    Isn’t the song in one of your videos “Baby Mine” fromDumbo? That’s possibly how you are linked to “disney crows shoe fly.” There is a scene in Dumbo where Dumbo and Timothy wake up in…was it a tree? This is where they discover Dumbo can fly. However, they are heckled by a bunch of crows with the song “When I See An Elephant Fly”; the phrase “shoo fly” or “shoe fly” is one of the phrases in the intro to the song that is composed entirely of double entendre.

    As for “mummy pumpkins,” please remember that “mummy” is “mommy” in the U.S., but that “mummy” in the U.S. means a linen-wrapped mummified corpse, generally associated with horror movies more than ancient Egypt. Halloween is big in the U.S., and people love to carve really ornate jack-o-lanterns. A “mummy pumpkin” searcher was likely looking for a mummy graphic pumpkin carving pattern for Halloween.

    Yes, I really am nerdy enough to have given serious thought to unpacking all of these.

    Also, there are six naked guinea pigs on my bed.

    None of this solves the age-old question of whether or not Ned Flanders drinks tea, nor why God gives us eccentric mothers, but since I’m not consciously that I am breathing, and I don’t care what day he died on Jesus? If you need me, I’ll be working on my sailing for God coloring page.

  17. Oh, and Basil? You need a mani/pedi dude.

    • I had one that afternoon. I was not impressed. I kept hitting Mummy then looking in horror at my tootsies. I’m too tramatised to write about it but Mummy says that none of the others caused as much fuss as I did.

      Who me?!


      • Of course they didn’t. You have white paws, dude, no excuses. Boar up dude, boar up.

      • Mummy says I should be the easiest but Nutty is. He has dark paws but he just cuddles up to Mummy and kisses her chin lots. Nacho has had his first trim to and he wasn’t bothered. Buddy tries to twist himself so he can watch. Only I squeal like I am being murdered and jump around dramatically. Once they got the vet to do my claws and it took two vet nurses to restrain me and the vet snipping and even then they accidentally cut one too short and it bled a little. At least Mummy never does that!


      • True fact: Harville’s normal “wheek” is a murder scream. He’s a sweet and snuggly little gut, but every time he does it I tell him, “Harville, that is not your most endearing quality.

        Sophie isn’t much better — her “I am very upset!” little “wheek” is something between a high alarm call and being strangled.

  18. You find everything when you deal with the public.

  19. I get a lot of visits from one post in particular. People searching for “dog pain”. I get some weird things to… like just now it says “how far does my finger go in to express anal glands”… valid question I guess.

  20. Oh guys hilarious!! for some reason I keep getting ones about ladyboys????? what ever is going on!! hahahaahahh :)Hugs Fozziemum xxx

  21. Wow this was interesting 🙂 you have got us wondering now x

  22. We dropped by from Dennis the Viszla’s blog where we saw a comment you left. Really enjoyed this post. We’ve done a few on strange things that brought visitors to our blog and they’re always fun.

  23. hahah those are great

  24. We once had
    “And the sheep ran out so”
    So what? What we ask, what? We aren’t sheep! But guinea pigs!

  25. Some of those are hilarious!

  26. Hysterical! I never get anything interesting. I think the only one that has stuck out was someone who had searched “if the French cook with butter what do the English cook with.”

    I would guess butter 🙂

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