Not By The Hair On My Chinny Chin Chin!

IMG_1222 Today, while Mummy was at work whee heard a noise. It was the scariest noise whee have heard since the whoosh-bangs of the New Year! Scarier than the carpet eating machine and the green-spaghetti-stealing-chopper-mower. Even more terrifying than a bath. Yup, serious stuff. A banging, clattering noise from outside, in the BigWorld.

Whee froze and looked around worriedly. Then wheeked the loudest whee could manage for the little hoomans to save us.

“Help! Help!” Basil wailed, “It could be a monster!”
“Almost certainly from those noises.” I squeaked back, puffing out my chest and throwing my head back so I was all of my two and a half inches high.
Basil was so scared he tried to hide under me and ended up making both of us fall over.
“How am I supposed to protect you from approaching evil if you are going to be so silly?!” I huffed at him.
Basil sniffed and peered up at me, “How?!” he asked.
“How what?”” I wheeked.
“How will you protect me from the approaching evil?!”
“Oh,” I blustered “Using my highly trained martial farting exercises!”
“Don’t you mean Martial Arts?” Basil asked.
I frowned “No. I’m pretty sure the little hoomans were discussing martial farting. Beside what effect are crayons and water colours going to have against unstoppable evil?!”
“If it’s unstoppable . . . How will you stop it?
“Don’t ask stupid questions.” I snapped back, irritated by his logical thinking.

He opened his mouth again, no doubt about to utter another smartie pants comment when the door creaked open slowly and whee all watched it nervously.

“You can’t come in monster. Not by the fur and whiskers on my chinny chin chin!” I wheeked.

IMG_1196 Then a head poked round the living room door. “Don’t panic piggies,” littlest hooman comforted, “It’s just the weekly shopping.” He disappeared from view then appeared again, “And don’t worry, none of the veggies were damaged!” he promised seriously. Whee all sighed in relief.

“So . . . It wasn’t a monster?!” Basil asked.
“No,” I replied awkwardly “But if it had been whee would have kicked some booty!” I answered knowingly.

Well I’m sure if it came down to it whee would have!

Have a Fabulous Friday efurryone.



About hutchagoodlife

Tales and adventures from the hutches of British blogging guinea pigs!

Posted on January 11, 2013, in Piggy Blogs and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 29 Comments.

  1. oh you poor piggies.. =^..^= I’m glad the little hoomans were there. Oh and I wanted to drop by and let you know I nominated you for not one, not two but three awards.. check out my you can get the awards and the questions for the awards.

  2. I just want to let you know that I so enjoy your stories. They always make me smile. I look forward to them so much. Thanks. πŸ™‚

  3. You have a problem with Horrible Hoover also?

  4. Such brave piggies. I don’t like noises either! Or balloons. Or street signs. Or ladders……..”

    Love and licks,

  5. Thank goodness, I thought you might have to do some Karate.

  6. Martial farting. That’s a deadly skill to be busted out only in the most extreme circumstances πŸ™‚

  7. Such brave piggies your are!
    Wally & Sammy

  8. the bravest piggies in the world!

  9. I am so pleased you are safe and so are the veggies!

    typist has clearly not had enought coffee this morning as when she first read that post title from no where she added in another word – Not By The Hair On My Mums Chinny Chin Chin! See what I have to put up with??!!

  10. My Mom is pretty good at “Martial Farting” herself πŸ™‚

  11. Love the photos…….particularly the one of you and Basil hiding in your tent until you know what the BIG NOISE is! Happy Friday……..

    Kitty Hugs, Sammy

  12. We nominated you for an Inspiring Blog Award. If you don’t do awards, just consider it our way of showing appreciation for your blog and introducing other bloggers to you! πŸ™‚

  13. What a great story! I’m very good in Martial Farts too – it should be an olympic sports ;o) Have a beautiful friday ;o)

  14. Martial farting? Hahahaahaha!!

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